ADHD'ers tend to live in a "see it, feel it" world. In other words, as we see or visually imagine something, we instantly feel the emotion associated with that picture. This reactive strategy is directly related what should be a normal human stress response and can actually be very handy and effective in situations which demand instant reactivity and extreme behaviors. Many sports and even some professions require this level of reactivity. Imagine trying to play football and calmly 'thinking' about how you will respond to the player coming towards you? OUCH! No, 'see it, feel it', definitely has its place in the world. The problem for ADHD'ers is that, as a group, a) we can't turn off our reactivity; and b) we tend to perceive our thoughts and feelings as if they were real. In my experience, the first step toward being able to 'turn off' our reactivity is to acknowledge that reacting is NOT who we are, but something we do. It is simply a strategy for dealing with certain situations. Just not ALL situation. It's great for dangerous or threatening situations, but walking around, feeling like our partner, spouse or child pose a threat to us and behaving like that threat is real is absurd. Fortunately, retraining ourselves to respond, rather than react, is possible with time and patience. For myself, it does take a few minutes out of my day to do the neuro-sensory exercises and brain-training that allow me to be responsive rather than reactive. As for our emotions, there's an old saying, "When a normal person gets a flat tire they call AAA. When an ADHD'er gets a flat tire, they call suicide prevention." As ADHD'ers, we can be extreme in our emotions,especially those emotions related to our stress response--fear, anger, anxiety, sadness, guilt, and ultimately, depression. Fortunately, the NLC has a variety of neuro-sensory and brain-training exercises for stepping out of our emotions and allowing us to experience the world more clearly.

ADHD and Stuttering

In my experience with stammers, stutters, turrets, etc, there are always two parts and you touched on both--stress and brain function. For the purpose of this conversation, there are two sources of stress--event induced and personality-style induced. Unfortunately, many practitioners are only trained to address event induced stress and have no experience or model to address personality-style induced stress, as is common for folks with ADHD, Dyslexia, Autism, etc. As for brain function, the comment, "Because of the fact that nobody stammers when singing", is very revealing. The fact is correct and the reason is not only simple, it is key to removing issues such as stammers and stutters. When we sing, we always use the pattern recognition or right side of the brain. The simple fact is that when stutterers and stammerers are taught to speak with the right side of the brain, the problem virtually disappears.

ADHD and Mis-matchers

Adam is a classic mis-matcher. My oldest is the same. The sad part is that underneath this "survival mechanism" is a genuine need to feel a part of and connection with (that may be what is speaking some of the anger). It is great that you have caught on. There is no punishment that will "break him". And if you find one that does, what you have is a broken child. No, for this child, (and you're window is closing fast), you need to make his world smaller. Do whatever it takes to make his world so small, he can't possibly fail. Imagine he was a four-year-old. You wouldn't blame him and punish him because he doesn't understand the danger of using power tools or firearms. NO, you would remove those items from his world until he demonstrated that he was physically, mentally and emotionally ready to handle that responsibility. rule #1: Forget what he SHOULD be able to handle or what he SHOULD be responsible for. It's all nonsense. Stick to what IS, and let go of what should be. Create firm, unyielding boundaries. Take everything out of his world that he cannot successfully handle. As he demonstrates success, gradually expand his world. I like a mix of 90% success and 10% challenge in the beginning. Later he may be able to handle 80% success and 20% challenge. You might visit http://www.youtube.com/hughes1622 and watch "ADHD and Melt-downs". Hope that helps...

Math Games:
http://ping.fm/TWRMb

To be normal is the ideal aim of the unsuccessful. —Karl Gustav Jung
http://ping.fm/cLcAl

10 steps to perfect spelling on youtube: http://ping.fm/2iH0c

Auditory (Left-Brain) vs. Visual (Right Brain) Thinkers:
http://ping.fm/gfhe2

I'm sorry. I don't do normal.
http://ping.fm/N0mON

children who want to be in control

Some children and adults (particularly Cholerics) need to think that whatever they are going to do is THEIR idea. A technique we've used is to paint the child a picture of what's going to be happening (with parameters or conditions) and then ask the child for IDEAS about how to meet those conditions. It is often more palatable to have an IDEA rejected than it is to be told what to do. Keep fishing for ideas till you get the one you want. [This process is akin to the Socratic method of teaching and really matches with the Choleric learning and communication style.] What will please her is for her to THINK she is in control. With a bit of practice, this technique allows the parent to be in control by managing the conversation and at the same time provide the child with a degree of freedom and control (within the boundaries set by the parent). Hope that helps...

Knowing that You Know: Synesthesia in Learning

It's not uncommon for children with sensory processing issues, including those students with Dyslexia, ADHD, Autism, SPD and PDD's, to struggle with certain aspects of learning. One of the reasons this may occur is that the student is unable to know when he has the correct answer. Regardless of how much the student studies for the test, he still finds himself essentially guessing on all or most of the questions. The phenomena behind this 'knowing' is called synesthesia--a fancy word that means, "The union of two different senses". For example, the sense of smell combined with sight. Or you see something and it evokes a smell. Or you hear a sound and you can see the sound in your mind. A popular book on the subject is, "The Man Who Tasted Shapes." So what does tasting shapes have to do with learning? Research has show that the way we, as human beings, know whether something is correct or incorrect, good or bad, right or wrong, moral or immoral, is NOT how it LOOKS or SOUNDS, but how it FEELS. So our access to effective recognition, i.e., "Knowing that we know", is our ability to FEEL the answer-- to FEEL what we see, hear or read. When a student is overloaded with sensory information or if he is blocking out sensory information, he may be unable to sense the subtle but important Feeling that would allow him to recognize whether an answer is correct or incorrect. To further complicate the issue, it seems that some students can only evoke an Auditory/Kinesthetic Synesthesia while others, are limited to a Visual/Kinestetic Synesthesia. These differences seem to correlate directly to a students preferred learning style. Fortunately, with proper training, virtually any student can learn to recognize and utilize the synesthesia appropriate to his learning style. More on Synesthesia and Learning at http://www.atutoringplace.com.